“Alec, I’ll take ‘Three-Letter Controversy’ for $800.”
“This item kills thousands of Americans every year. It’s easy for people in Montana to legally acquire and operate one, but New Yorkers have a tougher time doing so and Londoners find it nearly impossible. Using one correctly was once considered to be a normal prerequisite of American manhood but in today’s campy culture it’s often satirized as a psychological substitute for the once-controversial but now societally-approved free and morally ambiguous usage of a substantial penis. Disparaging the ownership and abuse of this item on social media is the number-one pastime of non-beautiful women and twentysomething men who cannot bench press two hundred pounds. Robert Farago created a website about it.”
“Alec, this one’s a no-brainer. What is a gun?”
“I’m sorry. I’m afraid the correct answer is: What is a car? No, wait, I’m hearing from our backstage experts. Your answer is also correct.”
Firearms and automobiles have been the focus of the progressive kulturkampf in America since before most of TTAC’s readers and contributors were born. Many strange bedfellows are made in the process, and thus it is that the Atlantic finds itself in the position of praising the automobile for a very particular purpose.