Posts By: Jack Baruth
How the mighty have fallen. I don’t mean General Motors, which once literally made the earth tremble from its world-war-winning industrial prowess but which has now effectively given up on the idea of engineering a small car in the United States. Nor do I mean Gibson Guitar, operator of the Beale Street Custom Shop pictured […]
“Alec, I’ll take ‘Three-Letter Controversy’ for $800.”
“This item kills thousands of Americans every year. It’s easy for people in Montana to legally acquire and operate one, but New Yorkers have a tougher time doing so and Londoners find it nearly impossible. Using one correctly was once considered to be a normal prerequisite of American manhood but in today’s campy culture it’s often satirized as a psychological substitute for the once-controversial but now societally-approved free and morally ambiguous usage of a substantial penis. Disparaging the ownership and abuse of this item on social media is the number-one pastime of non-beautiful women and twentysomething men who cannot bench press two hundred pounds. Robert Farago created a website about it.”
“Alec, this one’s a no-brainer. What is a gun?”
“I’m sorry. I’m afraid the correct answer is: What is a car? No, wait, I’m hearing from our backstage experts. Your answer is also correct.”
Firearms and automobiles have been the focus of the progressive kulturkampf in America since before most of TTAC’s readers and contributors were born. Many strange bedfellows are made in the process, and thus it is that the Atlantic finds itself in the position of praising the automobile for a very particular purpose.
At the end of the General Motors press conference that opened the Detroit show this year, when the hilariously maladjusted and intermittently inoperational mega-watt sound system blurted its last distorted dubstep doooooooooosh, and the Bolt concept had conclusively proven its ability to drive a hundred feet on a smooth surface without requiring another bailout or a money shot from a fire extinguisher, all eyes were on Mary Barra, and my main man Rodney was no exception to this rule. However, my friend, a Billy Dee Williams lookalike and a two-decade dealership industry veteran who was thoroughly enjoying his first NAIAS as a member of The Press As A Whole, wasn’t interested in what Ms. Barra had to say. Far from it.
While everybody else was trying to get on the list for press drives of the new NSX, our intrepid leader took a test ride of the UNI-CUB. Filming by me.
Derek’s editorial yesterday on the idea that you need to look upmarket for truly awful cars nowadays ruffled quite a few feathers among the B&B. Some of you thought Derek was simply repeating the usual TTAC tropes. Others wanted to hear more about why expensive cars often fail to meet the same expectations that a Camry or CR-V easily exceed. To the first group of readers, I can only say: You’re going to hear about ethics in journalism on this site almost half as often as you heard about the Chevy Sonic when they were co-branding with Jalopnik. To the second group of readers: click the jump, okay?
It’s a terrible stereotype on the Internet that Toyota drivers in general, and Corolla drivers in particular, are the least demanding, least discerning, and least conscious drivers in America. Yet Toyota keeps blatantly demonstrating their corporate buy-in to that particular preconception. As seen here.
This latest Sponsored Tweet from the world’s most successful automaker gives you a pretty good idea of how Corolla buyers view the world. OMFG IT HAS NAV. JUST LIKE THE 1999 C-CLASS, AND MY TRACFONE. Whatever. Welcome to the next level. We have nav.
The recent fall in fuel prices isn’t just an opportunity for Americans to demonstrate their collective inability to remember the events of even the recent past; it’s also a decisive hammerblow to E85 plants and retailers across the country.
This has to be the case, right?
Yesterday, I called your attention to the plight of a homeless veteran. In under 24 hours, TTAC’s B&B teamed up with the readers of Gearbox to nearly double the original amount requested.
Thank you for this. And if you contributed but do not have an email from me in your inbox about it, please post below and I’ll catch up with you.
It’s an American tradition to help the less fortunate around the winter holidays. After the bell rings for New Year’s, however, many people who need assistance find themselves out in the cold. This weekend, the founder of Gearbox is trying to help a homeless veteran who needs a car — but not for the reason you’d suspect.