TTAC's Ten Worst Automobiles Today (TWAT) Awards: Six Month Update

Six months ago, this website published its Ten Worst Automobiles Today (TWAT) awards. While the resulting publicity pretty much killed our access to press cars, it had to be said. As we ready ourselves for readers' '07 TWAT nominations and the eventual awards dinner (yes, you're invited), let's see how last year's "winners" have fared since TTAC named and shamed the Ten Worst Automobiles Today.

10. Chevrolet Aveo: alive and, uh, well

"In the case of this captive Korean import, you pay little and get even less."

Driving a Chevy Aveo5 was like pedaling a bicycle through a Hell's Angels' motorcade: slow, noisy and frightening. And yet, since scoring a TWAT, consumers have shown their desperation for cheap, high-mileage vehicles (and their ignorance of TTAC's editorial wisdom) by sending sales up 53%.

9. Lincoln Mark LT: fading fast

"The Mark LT is a rolling testament to Dearborn's short-term, suicidal reliance on bean-counted engineering."

In 2006, Lincoln unloaded about 1k florid F-150’s per month. Only about 700 customers per month are currently looking at $9800 worth of first year depreciation, minus a $4k rebate. Still, anyone who loves their LT isn’t likely to care. At least not yet.

8. Saab 9-7x: doomed

"You know what I hate most about the Saab 9-7X? It's a Chevy Trailblazer with the ignition key between the seats."

Badge-engineering this mutant must be a low-cost proposition; GM's still building 9-7x's despite selling fewer than 500 per month. The model will surely die with the rest of the Trailblazer clones in 2010, to be replaced by the 9-4X. With Saab's DNA DOA, can another TWAT be far behind?

7. Subaru B9 Tribeca: struggling for survival

"The fact that the B9 is also slow, thirsty and cramped proves that repulsiveness can be more than skin deep."

Tired of TTAC-inspired sniggering and lackluster sales, Subaru is about to modify the Tribeca's infamous "flying vagina" grill and slot-in a bigger engine. The B9-no-more (if it ever was) will still be as ugly as current sales figures. Subie sold just 3606 examples in the first three months of ‘07, down 22.8% from last year's miserable total. We reckon it's only a matter of time…

6. Chevrolet Monte Carlo: dead

"The Chevrolet Monte Carlo is a wrong wheel-drive engineering joke from the late ‘80's."

The darling of the NASCAR set heads for the big pit stop in the sky this June. Dale Jr. fans need not despair. Chevy has a brand new set of Impala SS decals ready to plaster on NASCAR's generic "Car of Tomorrow." How great is that?

5. Hummer H2: doomed

"While the H2 doesn't come with hair plugs, it tells the world that the man behind the wheel has a small penis, or brain, or both."

When gas prices went up, H2 sales went down– 27% from last year. Quelle surprise! With the smaller, less hideous H3 on the market, the H2 is destined for retirement.

4. Chrysler Aspen: DOA

"It's a perfect example of the old adage ‘Just because you can do something doesn't mean you should.'"

A huge, thirsty, expensive, poorly-built, Pacifica-faced SUV based on the Durango, one of the worst-selling SUV's on the market? I'll take two. Meanwhile, Chrysler sold just 7244 Aspens in the first quarter of '07. The just-announced hybrid Hemi Aspen won't do diddley to ressurect this stillborn syllogism.

3. Buick Rendezvous: dead

"The Rendezvous embodies everything that's brought GM to the brink: penny pinching, brand dilution and chronic neglect."

GM is shutting down the plant where this minivan-based SUV is manufactured. The dubiously port-holed Enclave replaces both the Rendezvous and Ranier (a Chevy Trailblazer with the key on the ignition column, right where God intended).

2. Jeep Compass: struggling

"The Compass stomps all over Jeep's reputation as America's purveyor of authentic off-road vehicles."

When a company known for “Trail Rated” off-roaders bases a vehicle on a front wheel-drive family car, only L.L. Bean fashion victims need apply. Apparently, there aren’t a whole lot of buyers answering to that description. At the start of April, Jeep had a 117-day supply of the not-so-cute-ute languishing on their lots.

1. GM Minivans: dead

"For their… cancerous effect on not one but four GM brands and their abject inability to hold a candle to their foreign-owned competition, GM's minivans earn The Truth About Cars' accolade as the worst vehicles currently for sale in America."

These vans were so bad they caused their manufacturer to abandon an entire market segment. After this year, they're toast.

Speaking of toasts, in six months time we'll be raising our glasses to TTAC's 2007 TWAT award winners. It's too early to tell if last year's survivors will make it onto this year's list. But it's not too early to begin thinking about which vehicles will become one of TTAC's Ten Worst Automobiles Today.

[NOTE: TTAC is not asking for official TWAT nominations at this time.]

Click here for all articles about the '06 TWAT Awards