By on October 1, 2013

5keysdog

Late last night, a friend of mine posted the above video on my wall. At 2:15, CNet CarTech’s Brian Cooley demonstrates how the big Chrysler can read one’s text messages aloud. The example used may fly under the radar of most people, but anybody who has ever listened to rap music, or dealt massive quantities of cocaine, will pick up on it immediately.

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At 2:10, Cooley discusses the feature, and upon hitting a button to vocalize the message, a female computerized voice robotically asks  “Hey can you spot me 5 keys on credit dog?” While I’ve never ever sold narcotics in my life, years of listening to gangsta rap gives me enough knowledge of street lingo to know that the individual in question is asking to be supplied with 5 kilos of drugs (most likely cocaine, as that drug tends to be denominated in kilograms) on credit. Current rap songs place the value of a kilo of cocaine at about $17,500, which would mean that the sender is asking for a very generous loan – almost enough to buy two 300 SRT8 Core models.

Why this even appeared is an utter mystery. But it’s also something that I could envision somebody doing as an “easter egg” to see if anyone is paying attention. At the very least, CNet gave my friends and I a good laugh.

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81 Comments on “Why Is There A Hidden Drug Reference In CNet’s Review Of The Chrysler 300 SRT8?...”


  • avatar
    ash78

    Ralph Gilles has 99 problems, but this glitch ain’t one

  • avatar
    Dan

    Recall the Thanksgiving day football game a couple years back where Ndamukong Suh was ejected for stomping on an opposing player. He showed up pitching the 300 in the very next commercial segment.

    Chrysler knows their demographic and it isn’t Mayberry.

    • 0 avatar
      Lorenzo

      Exactly! Look for 300s to be offered with extra bling, rear hidden compartments, and the darkest factory window tint they can get away with.

    • 0 avatar
      racer-esq.

      I see a lot of 300s in the suburbs. However, I saw even more Magnums. That was a car a person could maybe talk his wife into instead of an SUV. Killing the Magnum for the second generation was really stupid, I would love to hear the reasoning for it.

      • 0 avatar
        MK

        Lol I was thinking about the magnum the other day as I drove through the hood on my way to the plant. In my economically depressed mid-south area the ONLY magnums I see on the road are beaters in colors like lime metallic green. I haven’t seen one in a middle class neighborhood in almost a decade.
        Yeah I don’t see those things coming back.

      • 0 avatar
        nrd515

        They didn’t sell, and needed the production capacity to add the Challenger. There are a lot of Magnums here in the Toledo area though. The 300 is popular across all ages and races, etc, I know a lot of people who have one, or had one, ranging from a neighbor in his late 70′s with a 300C, my ex GF, a 42 year old grandmother who has a 300c, a friend’s wife with a 300 with the 3.6 and the 8 speed, and my friend who used to have a customized 300SRT that was stolen and parted out. It was replaced by a blown 440 cubic in stroker Challenger. 725+ HP (At the rear wheels) of fun!

  • avatar
    IHateCars

    ^Lol…well done ash!

    Are 300s the gangsta car of choice as I’m led to believe playing GTA?

    • 0 avatar
      bball40dtw

      As I often have to be in Detroit’s east side for work, I would say that the 300 is popular with the urban gentleman that has disposable income. The Charger/Challenger V8 versions are also very popular. I have seen plenty of 2-door Tahoes/Yukons with donks lately. Those seem to be replacing the 80s American iron.

      I wouldn’t drive or park a Charger/300/Magnum/Challenger or Ram in the City of Detroit. They are stolen and car jacked at an even higher rate than everything else. No one ever wanted my Oldsmobile Achieva when I lived in the city though. It was even an SCX.

      • 0 avatar
        PrincipalDan

        In the early part of this century I was living in Southfield, MI right around 13 mile in an apartment complex. My ride was a 1987 Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme Brougham sedan with heavy chrome, 307 quadrajet, posi-trac, locking wire-wheel covers and opera lights. It was stolen over Thanksgiving weekend in 2001.

        The security guard at the school I worked at (former Detroit cop) said the first time he saw the car: “That’s a drug running car.”

        • 0 avatar
          bball40dtw

          I’m not suprised. I played basketball against Southfield High School that same year. All our street clothes and stuff was stolen from the locker room during the 2nd half.

        • 0 avatar
          joeveto3

          For many years the Cutlass was THE most stolen car. They slld so many, and the interchangeability with the other G bodies made them a very hot item.

          My parents Grand Prix (with t-tops) was stolen out of a driveway only to be found a month later, stripped bare with a dog living inside. But this was the east side of Cleveland – same difference.

          • 0 avatar
            thegamper

            I recall seeing a piece on dateline or some similar news program about thieves stripping cars. The stripped hulks of cars eventually will end up at a salvage auction. The same thieves who steal the parts will store the parts and wait. Wait for the salvage auction, buy a clear title to the vehicle for a song, rebuild the vehicle and now have a nice new car with clear title. Maybe this practice is common knowledge and has been put to rest, but it seemed rather a brilliant crime to me at the time.

    • 0 avatar
      ash78

      Here in the mid-South, it’s most definitely the urban car of choice. Most other brands and vehicles cross demographics pretty evenly, but the 300 is very demographically aligned with young urban black men, no doubt.

      When I see a stock example, I almost do a double take… “You mean some of them had 16″ rims and no porthole vents?”

    • 0 avatar
      CoreyDL

      The 300 isn’t even in the new GTA (5) least as far as I’ve seen after playing extensively.

  • avatar
    Davekaybsc

    Cooley isn’t the greatest in terms of describing a car’s performance and handling characteristics, but I’ve always given him credit for being one of the best Car Tech reviewers (which is kind of the whole point of Cnet’s car reviews anyway, they’ve never tried to be Motortrend) in the business. Cnet got there first, they’ve been covering NAV and infotainment setups in cars on camera since the launch of the 2005 Acura RL.

    Cooley also has a great sense of humor and it wouldn’t surprise me one bit if this is all a joke.

    • 0 avatar
      redrum

      Cooley is by far CNET’s most entertaining personality. About a year ago he was reviewing a car (don’t remember which one) and at the end of the review, where he goes over the available options and whether they’re worth it, he mentioned some ostentatious option and said something like “don’t be an asshole, skip it”. Totally perfect.

  • avatar
    fiasco

    Shocked they didn’t go with a Blue Sky reference. Chrysler 300, the choice of Heisenberg.

  • avatar

    Owning this car and the Jeep is like having American-made Nissan “GT-R”. From the moment I start either car in the morning till the moment I park it and go to bed, I think about the fun I had with them that day. They offer the same highs and lows as medical-use morphine.

    12 Smiles per Gallon.

    • 0 avatar
      bball40dtw

      So your 300 causes constipation, dizziness, confusion, numbness, and you have to take shorter and shorter drives before you stop using it?

      • 0 avatar

        constipation… YES

        dizziness… ALL THE TIME

        confusion… “Where did all my gas go???”

        numbness… I have callouses on my hands I can show you from the wheel.

        and you have to take shorter and shorter drives before you stop using it?… That’s due to the fact Premium Unleaded is still around $3.90 a gallon.

        Same story with my Jeep.

        • 0 avatar
          bball40dtw

          Fantastic.

          BTW- last week I got my first seat time in the 300 SRT8. It’s fantastic. I’m waiting for the next Mustang though.

          • 0 avatar

            Mustang’s never really interested me. I love my Jeep and 300 because they are dark and intimidating.

          • 0 avatar
            bball40dtw

            I don’t want our 3rd car to have four doors. Also, my wife doesn’t like either the 300 or GC.

          • 0 avatar
            hubcap

            “I’m waiting for the next Mustang though.”

            The next Mustang will be the best Mustang ever. Smaller, lighter, IRS, and hopefully Ford will see fit to source an appropriate interior.

            If the rumors are right and it comes in at 3400 lbs and 450 hp (GT variant) its gonna open a whole lot of whoop ass on a number of cars.

            Came with the next gen Camaro *if* GM sees fit to correct those things that should have never been approved on the current car.

          • 0 avatar
            bball40dtw

            I am hoping the Mach 1 is the correct level of awesome, just like the Boss 302.

          • 0 avatar
            nrd515

            I really hope it doesn’t look like the pic a friend showed me, of what he claimed was a 2015 Mustang. If it is, it’s a disaster, looks wise. I hope he’s wrong, but he hasn’t been in like 30 years. Looks like a typical squashed egg car with Mustang badges and stuff tacked on. Hideous. I hope somehow, that the guy who sent him the pic is just playing a joke on him. If not…shudder. I have to pin my hopes on the next Camaro no being as awful looking as the present one is, or it’s another Challenger for me about 2016.

        • 0 avatar
          AJ

          LOL… sounds like a good Friday night.

      • 0 avatar
        Hank

        It’s the flatulence, frequent bowel movements, and the inability to control them along with the gas with oily discharge that’ll really ruin your day.

    • 0 avatar
      Kenmore

      “medical-use morphine”

      That’s what I’m talkin about.
      That and a cup full of ice chips.

  • avatar
    jmo

    You sure it’s not a reference to 4kg of Blue Sky Meth from our man Heisenberg?

    You will note that Heisenberg (aka Walter White) drives a 300 on Breaking Bad.

  • avatar
    I_Like_Pie

    I think the reference is a poke at the observance of a 300 typically being owned and preferred by one with a thuggish, something to prove attitude that emulates a drug kingpin or shady urban self made man.

    I see a 300 cruise by and I envision either a Jersey greaseball or a young gangster about to cap your arse.

    I may be wrong, but the windows are usually tinted so dark that I can’t shoot down the stereotype at all.

    • 0 avatar
      Silent Ricochet

      Is it bad that I immediately thought of this too? After reading all of the other comments it looks as though many others don’t share the same perception.

      Most of the times that I see a Chrysler 300 burble down the street it’s got Rims, 0% tints, rap music thumping through the sheet metal and if it’s nice out, a “gangster” or “thug”-like figure leaning back in his seat; one hand with his ridiculous gold watch on the steering wheel. All I can think is, Tool.

      • 0 avatar

        Funny, it does not have this stigma north of the border. They are usually driven by older gentlemen.

        • 0 avatar
          krhodes1

          Here in Maine they are pretty much universally rental cars.

          And who the heck is this John Varvados dude, and what does he have to do with cars?

          • 0 avatar
            bball40dtw

            John Varvatos is a menswear designer that grew up in Detroit/Downriver suburbs and has worked for and was head of menswear at Ralph Lauren and Clavin Klein. He now has his own brand.

            He did a one off 300S to be auctioned off for charity. Chrysler then decided to do some special editions with him.

        • 0 avatar
          danio3834

          They never sold in as great numbers up here so therefore aren’t quite as accessible. Still, I see the stereotype from time to time.

          Doesn’t make me not want them, though.

          • 0 avatar

            Having grown up near the Jamaican neighborhood, there were a few that popped up with the famous “Bentley grille” and big chrome wheels. I can do without the latter too, but I’d still like a 300C Luxury Series.

        • 0 avatar
          IHateCars

          This is true.
          When the 300 first came out, my wife’s elderly uncle got one and was tickled pink that he could set the car’s voice prompts to his mother tongue….Italian. It was a pretty cool feature and a few of his paisans had a 300 shortly thereafter.

      • 0 avatar
        28-Cars-Later

        My city’s police refer to them as “ghetto Cadillacs”.

        • 0 avatar
          mike978

          It has the same reputation here in NC from what I see – typically driven by African American’s with none standard rims etc. The Charger is even more into that demographic.

          • 0 avatar
            CoreyDL

            Funny, here in SW ohio, I see light/medium blue ones driven by older people. Any other color is usually ghetto-fied. They like em in white/black/silver.

            All 2nd generation Q45′s here are ghetto-fied too.

            All Caprice-anything as well.

            And almost all QX56, unless silver colored. Those are driven by middle age white people.

        • 0 avatar
          CJinSD

          That seems redundant.

          • 0 avatar
            28-Cars-Later

            I thought the same way, and I asked different officers why this was the nickname. One said it was because actual Cadillacs had seemingly got more expensive (after 05) or somehow less available to the ghetto folk. A few years back all of the “players” rode around in disposable Northstar Cadillacs because they were so cheap to buy, as Cadillac improved I suppose resale did as well. Another explained because prior to the 300, the absolute favorite ghetto ride was the Brougham/Fleetwood Brougham and as those died off the 300 gave them that size/ride/feeling again.

    • 0 avatar

      My neighbor is a retired White male former-law enforcer with an exemplary history.

      He just bought a Hemi-c 2013

      I’m a 32 year old Black guy who’s 6’6 tall, no criminal record and ooze of awesomeness.

      I like the car cause it’s big, beautiful and AMERICAN (although made in Canada)

      youtu.be/tgN0zHD4s14

      • 0 avatar
        28-Cars-Later

        I’m not a Chrysler man but I agree its a proud American car.

      • 0 avatar
        racer-esq.

        It’s basically a retro Lincoln Continental (the old 300s were pretty ugly/baroque). So it is of course awesome.

        How many people in 1960 (or 1970, 1980 or 1990), if you told them that in 2013, out of Cadillac, Lincoln and Chrysler, only one brand sells a large rear-wheel-drive sedan, would guess Chrysler? Not many.

      • 0 avatar
        ellomdian

        1st Gen (Through ’10) – “The Chrysler 300 is based on the rear-wheel drive Chrysler LX platform which features components derived from the W211 Mercedes-Benz E-Class of 2003 to 2009.[6] Shared components include the rear suspension design, front seat frames, wiring harnesses, steering column, the 5-speed automatic transmission’s design, and a derivative of the 4Matic all-wheel drive system. The Chrysler 300 also features a double wishbone front suspension that is derived from the W220 Mercedes-Benz S-Class.”

        I haven’t had the chance to see a 2nd gen in the shop yet (Roommates has been reasonably reliable) but I would love to see how many parts have German lettering and stamping.

        I love that you can sell a down-market E-class to aspirational ghetto-bangers, and an upmarket 4-door to aspirational jingoists in the same package… :)

        • 0 avatar

          “I love that you can sell a down-market E-class to aspirational ghetto-bangers, and an upmarket 4-door to aspirational jingoists in the same package… :)”

          The simple fact is that many people (especially men) buy cars that are intimidating. True hoodlums prefer Mercedes, BMW and Audi, but due to the credit crunch and the fact they deal mostly in cash, many of the dealers I know have lost their BMW6, CL, CLS and E-classes to SONATAS and TAURUS/FUSIONS.

      • 0 avatar
        DC Bruce

        I think what sets the 300 apart is that it’s a car with a LOT of swagger. I’ve always liked it, even when the interior sucked and all of the available engines (other than the Hemi) also sucked.

        The car just has road presence, like a lot of Detroit Big Iron did back in the 1950s and 1960s. I don’t think any of today’s Cadillacs have that kind of presence and Lincoln — YGTBFKM!

        And yes, it does help that it accommodates someone over 6 feet tall quite well.

        And, BTW, I’m definitely on the high side of 60, if that makes a difference, about 2x your age, Big Truck, to be precise.

        • 0 avatar

          My friend bought a 300 back when they were first released and EVERYONE wanted one. That “crappy interior” everyone complains about looked FINE back then – especially if you had the Navigation system and other electronics to eat up the space the plastic normally would take up. The Japanese cars of the time were NO BETTER.

          • 0 avatar
            CoreyDL

            You’re right. The 300 had no worse plastics than any Japanese Lexus. Totally.

          • 0 avatar

            I’ll take a rubbermade 300 SRT over ANYTHING Lexus offers.

            If someone came to me right now and said, I’ll GIVE you a free Lexus LS600 or a 300SRT…

            I’d take the Lexus LS600

            SELL IT.

            Then Buy a SUPERCHARGER for my Jeep SRT and another SUPERCHARGER for my 300SRT.

      • 0 avatar
        I_Like_Pie

        It is an awesome car. I really do like them. However in the the urban south they really have a reputation as a thug car.

        That is unfortunate because the latest hot rodded version is amazing.
        It is also unfortunate because if you drive through many parts of Atlanta you will be unfairly suspected of being up to no good by the city’s finest.

      • 0 avatar
        tuffjuff

        BTS you totally DO ooze of awesomeness.

    • 0 avatar
      nrd515

      In my experience, and I know a lot of people who own 300′s and see a lot of people driving them, the typical driver is a white woman or a man of any race, between 40 or so, and death. At least in this town, there are only a small number of “Gangster” drivers with 300s of any kind. When I see a non-hemi 300, I imagine it will be driven by a middle aged or older white woman, and if it’s a hemi one, driven my a man roughly my own age. I was pretty close to buying a 300 in late 2007, but I bought a Charger instead. In 2010 I swapped it for what I wanted all along, a Challenger.

  • avatar
    forzablu

    ROI on 5 keys is better than betting on Chrysler IPO.

  • avatar

    They might be moving virtually any substance that is measured in kilos. Remarkably, most of the world measures even vegetables and meat in “keys”. Or, how would a Euro-hipster stylin’ in his 300 front his bud the cash to buy 5 keys of heirloom tomatoes, or filet mignon, or cooked crab…

  • avatar
    racer-esq.

    “The example used may fly under the radar of most people” – No way, key is about as ubiquitous of a term as pot. Something like “Do you want to go skiing tonight” would be a bit more under the radar, but I think that’s a pretty common reference also. Still, his attempt at going viral has gotten him at least one link.

  • avatar
    racer-esq.

    Stratfor puts a key at between $24,000 and $27,000 wholesale ( http://www.stratfor.com/weekly/mexicos-cartels-and-economics-cocaine ). Given their reputation I don’t put a lot of faith in that number, but I give them more street credibility than Young Jeezy.

  • avatar
    brenschluss

    Well shit, listen to the guy.

  • avatar
    Lie2me

    I guess Chrysler is in on it as well with the special edition 300′s such as the “Motown 300″ and the “Glacier (ice) 300″ maybe they should start calling the SRT8 an “Eightball” that ought to bring ‘em in

  • avatar
    Instant_Karma

    I am probably horribly wrong but it could be a Breaking Bad easter egg thing, Heisenberg did drive a 300.

  • avatar
    myheadhertz

    The 300 SRT is a nice car and all. But, when you gotta deliver a load of Robitussin to some gravel pit out on Brace Hill Road down in Taney County, an old Jeep Cherokee is a better choice. Just Saying.


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