By on April 4, 2013

Apparently this is a BMW X4, which is an X6-esque version of the not-yet-released 4-Series, which is the coupe version of the 3-Series. I have no idea what’s going on here. This segment is going to be big in the future, it’s an easy way for BMW to make money but I can’t even tell what’s what anymore. And it’s ugly.

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35 Comments on “BMW Launches The X4 GranCoupeTurismoMSport...”


  • avatar
    wsimon

    Behold, the Honda Crosstour for the B-grade trophy wife.

    • 0 avatar
      tatracitroensaab

      I really like this actually for some reason. whats wrong with me lol? It looks way better than the 3 series gt, where their design language translated a little awkwardly.

  • avatar
    Fordson

    At this point I would love to see all of BMW’s incredibly gifted powertrain and suspension people quit and go to work for other makes.

  • avatar

    3 days behind deadline, Derek.

  • avatar
    gakoenig

    I once asked the owner of the local BMW dealership WTF was up with the X6, 5 Series GT and all the other weird stuff BMW was cooking up. He had a one word answer:

    China.

    Apparently, the Chinese market just goes gaga over this crap. Lots of the roads suck, so ground clearance is a big selling point and the folks there love the fastback look. BMW NA flat out tells dealers that they won’t move many of these and that BMW sort of recognizes that western tastes may look at such vehicles with a jaundice eye and wonder what the hell BMW is smoking, but the sales in China are 100% worth it and the wacky cars are working out very well for them.

    • 0 avatar
      GiddyHitch

      They are certainly more common in China than they are in the US or Germany based on my casual observation. Dare I say that there’s something almost appealing about the X6 when it’s prowling the rough and tumble Chinese highways and byways? While they certainly do have some modern highways, they also have many abrupt transitions, gaping potholes, ramshackle asphalt, cars stopping/reversing/drifting/driving the wrong way without warning, road repair crews and broke-down trucks without adequate signage to alert you to their presence until you’re almost on top of them, frequent traffic jams necessitating driving up onto sidewalks/parking blocks/shrubbery/etc. to drive around them, etc.

  • avatar
    stars9texashockey

    Behold the new Spirit. Coincidence that BMW & AMC are just 1 letter apart? I think not.

  • avatar
    Type57SC

    I’ll accept this into the portfolio if it replaces the 3 series GT. Having both seems like incredible overlap.

    On another topic, the germans’ “new niche each month” strategy actually works well with their crappy vehicle naming since people are more likely to call this a “BMW” than and X4, whereas if Lincoln was not the gimp of the Ford Brand and had released the 2002 Continental, people would call it a “Continental” not a “Lincoln”, chewing up precious top funnel advertising dollars. Maybe bland-tastic alphanumeric model names acutally make sense…

  • avatar
    sportyaccordy

    Sadly, I can trace and rationalize the line between this and the E30. But hey, BMW is in the business of selling cars, not making the internet happy. The existence of this doesn’t preclude anyone from buying a legitimate used BMW.

  • avatar
    Kyree S. Williams

    I’m sure these’ll be popular. They’ll probably sell all three of them…

  • avatar
    niky

    See… I hate the 5GT, I think the new 1-series is ugly as hell, and I still don’t get why the new 6-series sedan isn’t the new 5-series sedan instead….

    But given the horribly cramped and utterly disproportionate X1… dare I say it? I think the X4 is kind of nice. And it doesn’t have its catfish going on, either. Now BMW can stop pretending to be practical, drop the X1, X3 and X5 (with those ridiculous optional third row seats) and just sell the X4 and X6.

    (Want a practical crossover? Go buy a CRV)

    • 0 avatar
      Kyree S. Williams

      I wouldn’t suggest that they drop the X3 or X5, since those are bread-and-butter models, but they should stop putting third-row seats in the X5, which sacrifices an actual spare tire for them…

      • 0 avatar
        corntrollio

        Sounds like they need an X7…

        Still can’t figure out how they shoe-horned that 3rd row into the X5.

        • 0 avatar
          niky

          Drop the spare, shoehorn seats off of a Japanese… scratch that… Chinese commuter bus in there, wrap them in leather so it’s not so obvious… The X5 third row rivals the AMG E-class third row as one of the worst luxury car seating spaces in the world…

          Yes, BMW should definitely make an X7, so they can give it an actual third row. And, as a bonus, once they have an X7, they won’t need to make a minivan anymore.

        • 0 avatar
          CoreyDL

          The X7 was in development but was dropped, I believe, around the time of the financial crisis.

          • 0 avatar
            corntrollio

            Looks like it’s back — there are spy shots:

            http://www.gtspirit.com/2013/01/17/spyshots-2014-bmw-x7-spotted-testing-in-california/

            Also appears that with the slimming of the Audi Q7 under MLB, there will be a Q9 that’s slightly bigger.

            Audi has also been planning even-numbered Q-cars to compete with the even numbered BMWs. So expect a Q6 to compete with the X6. It seems like China might be driving the Q6 thing too.

    • 0 avatar
      jkross22

      I’m going to hold out for the:

      X4 M Xdrive Alpina

  • avatar

    “I have no idea what’s going on here.”

    Yes you do.

    Don’t like that character lines. But probably will outdo the Evoque. I like how flat the hood is.

  • avatar
    azmtbkr81

    The scale of these larger BMW crossovers always throws me, they look like compact cars that have been inflated to 1.5 times their original size. This one looks like Shaq’s Mazda 3.

  • avatar
    Tstag

    Wait its not April 1st….. That’s seriously ugly thank God Land Rover aren’t owned by BMW anymore or we may not have the stylish Evoque

  • avatar
    Signal11

    Let’s all hate it because it’s a little different.

    Seriously, I can’t see what the haters are on about. This is the best looking BMW X car so far. An Acura ZDX done right.

  • avatar
    vanwestcoaster

    I like it a lot. Based on these photos it ditches the Checker cab-like bloat of the X6, keeps the raised roof line, adds more side window area and a hatch offers everything a trunk does plus a lot more.

    Sorry if you think it doesn’t provide the same snobbish statement as a four-door sedan when it’s parked in a Costco parking lot. It captures the elegant and practical simplicity of the 2002 in a 21st century way.

  • avatar
    cargogh

    I hope it is too small to cut into the Acura ZDX sales. That would be horrific.

  • avatar
    Ryoku75

    While the styling is unpractical and ugly, I have to say that I love the name for this new mini-X6, who wouldn’t want a car with a name that takes half a minute to even say?

    I swear that “sport” is the modern “Landau”.

  • avatar
    BMWnut

    A two-door fastback hatchback all-wheel drive offroad (sort of) coupe? Why didn’t I think of that?

  • avatar
    CoreyDL

    One thing’s for sure, it’ll have loads of headroom in the back seat!

  • avatar
    retrogrouch

    BMW, the ultimate leasing machine

  • avatar
    threeer

    Sigh…so I’m house/puppy sitting for a friend of mine and every morning when I walk out to the garage I am met by an E30 325i and a 2004 E46 325i. Reminds me of my bachelor days when I had my E30 318i and 1993 E36 325i. I can’t even tell what some of these new Bimmers are. Seems BMW is spitting out cars that answer questions nobody seems to be asking (well, maybe those folks in China are). Growing up, BMW was THE marque brand for me, and it was all I could do to wait until I was old enough to get my hands on one (first one was my 1974 2002…the only car I regret selling to this day). Now? I haven’t stopped by the dealer’s lot in years. I’d take a nice used E46…but that’s about where my desire for a BMW ends. Oh, I’m sure they’ll sell some of these abominations (hello lease-world), and I’m sure the folks in Bavaria could give a rat’s patootie about BMW enthusiast drivers. And that, folks, is rather sad…

  • avatar
    RatherhaveaBuick

    BMW’s should now be called The Ultimate Douche Machine.


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