Another Car Show, Another MINI: John Cooper Works Paceman – Yes, My Name Is Longer Than Yours

Bertel Schmitt
by Bertel Schmitt

BMW executes on its plan to bring at least one new MINI to every show it graces. In Geneva, it is the MINI John Cooper Works Paceman, a.k.a. the MINI with the maxi name. If we believe the press release, the car “combines mouthwatering sporting flair and inimitable style to usher in a new dimension in driving fun.”

What’s more, “the new model sees the compact Sports Activity Coupé concept wrapped up in an extra layer of muscular proportions and dynamically stretched lines.”wait, there’s …

… more: “The driver and passengers can lap up the resultant sensation of race competition and the interior’s characteristic sports car ambience from four individual seats.” Who writes that stuff?

The engine is the familiar blown 1.6-liter four-cylinder mill It still “develops output of 160 kW/218hp and peak torque of 280 Newton meters (207 lb-ft), which can be increased to 300 Newton meters (221 lb-ft) for short periods between 2,100 and 4,500 rpm courtesy of the overboost function.”

Tell you what, instead of trying to wade through the multiple pages of the short form of the press release, here is the long form, ready for download. 1 megabyte, so watch your smartphone cap.

Collegial hint to BMW: Those press releases are a violation of the Geneva AND the Hague Land War Conventions. Their mitigating factor is the class leading rich supply of pictures. In that department, you are the best, BMW. Alright, we need to fill the space between the pictures, somehow …




Bertel Schmitt
Bertel Schmitt

Bertel Schmitt comes back to journalism after taking a 35 year break in advertising and marketing. He ran and owned advertising agencies in Duesseldorf, Germany, and New York City. Volkswagen A.G. was Bertel's most important corporate account. Schmitt's advertising and marketing career touched many corners of the industry with a special focus on automotive products and services. Since 2004, he lives in Japan and China with his wife <a href="http://www.tomokoandbertel.com"> Tomoko </a>. Bertel Schmitt is a founding board member of the <a href="http://www.offshoresuperseries.com"> Offshore Super Series </a>, an American offshore powerboat racing organization. He is co-owner of the racing team Typhoon.

More by Bertel Schmitt

Comments
Join the conversation
2 of 8 comments
  • Mjal Mjal on Feb 27, 2013

    Not to mention, there is no longer a cook in a restaurant, he/she is an "Executive Chef."

  • Oldyak Oldyak on Feb 28, 2013

    For the sake of us older,less 'techie' reader..could TTAC publish REAL HP and Torque numbers...not the 'newton'.."what the fuck is that"?? numbers. I have been reading everything on this site for a number of years and I feel that I deserve REAL American horsepower and torque info from your writers... If I'm being simplistic kick me off the site..but this is the second article that I have read that quotes these 'newton' numbers and its time to put a stop to it or publish both 'newton' and something every reader can understand!!

  • ToolGuy First picture: I realize that opinions vary on the height of modern trucks, but that entry door on the building is 80 inches tall and hits just below the headlights. Does anyone really believe this is reasonable?Second picture: I do not believe that is a good parking spot to be able to access the bed storage. More specifically, how do you plan to unload topsoil with the truck parked like that? Maybe you kids are taller than me.
  • ToolGuy The other day I attempted to check the engine oil in one of my old embarrassing vehicles and I guess the red shop towel I used wasn't genuine Snap-on (lots of counterfeits floating around) plus my driveway isn't completely level and long story short, the engine seized 3 minutes later.No more used cars for me, and nothing but dealer service from here on in (the journalists were right).
  • Doughboy Wow, Merc knocks it out of the park with their naming convention… again. /s
  • Doughboy I’ve seen car bras before, but never car beards. ZZ Top would be proud.
  • Bkojote Allright, actual person who knows trucks here, the article gets it a bit wrong.First off, the Maverick is not at all comparable to a Tacoma just because they're both Hybrids. Or lemme be blunt, the butch-est non-hybrid Maverick Tremor is suitable for 2/10 difficulty trails, a Trailhunter is for about 5/10 or maybe 6/10, just about the upper end of any stock vehicle you're buying from the factory. Aside from a Sasquatch Bronco or Rubicon Jeep Wrangler you're looking at something you're towing back if you want more capability (or perhaps something you /wish/ you were towing back.)Now, where the real world difference should play out is on the trail, where a lot of low speed crawling usually saps efficiency, especially when loaded to the gills. Real world MPG from a 4Runner is about 12-13mpg, So if this loaded-with-overlander-catalog Trailhunter is still pulling in the 20's - or even 18-19, that's a massive improvement.
Next