Have You Ever Said Goodbye To… A Money Pit?

Steven Lang
by Steven Lang

A 1995 Volvo 960. Supple leather that made long trips easy. Great safety and visibility. It represented what I thought would be the perfect family car.

I financed it quick enough. But then the troubles began.

First the engine coughed up a burnt valve. Took care of that.

Then the strut mounts started to groan a bit. A quick Ebay purchase and a little labor solved that one.

As soon as that was cleared up, the rear hatch door handle stopped working.

Two weeks later the electrical issues began. Erratic turn signals. The rear lights vanished due to a worn out wiring harness. The front lights began to do their own dancing in the dark. That was likely either an ignition switch or a multi-function assembly.

I started to think this car would someday soon be worth far more dead than alive.

At this point I told my customer, “Take this!” which was a Subaru Forester that didn’t give them one lick of trouble. I shucked the Volvo to a nearby dealer auction and chalked the experience to the laws of averages.

You can’t polish a rolling turd and expect to come out ahead. Sometimes cheap isn’t. Which brings me to a question that can only induce shudders and flashbacks to the long-time enthusiast.

Have you ever finally said goodbye to… a money pit? A rolling Beelzebub that swallowed dollars, Euros and parts like Kobyashi swallows hot dogs?

Extra credit will be given if you ended up using a flamethrower, a cliff, or in my next door neighbor’s case, a sledgehammer.

Steven Lang
Steven Lang

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  • Robc123 Robc123 on Aug 13, 2012

    Best was a 82 k-car sold it to pizza delivery guy for $250 but, with 635k on it, mind you it did go thru a can of oil a fillup. worst- 70' mgb total money pit. everything is wrong on that car even when new, still I was shy to get into a fiat prior to buying it. finally sold it to a mechanic/body guy. rule learned if stupid enough to ever buy old car, body work costs 5x more than mechanical.

    • Joeaverage Joeaverage on Nov 14, 2012

      To me - if a person doesn't want to learn to do the repair work themselves or if they aren't rich - pass on the old car. They need alot of old design related TLC and they need alot of TLC to overcome the previous owners' collective neglect.

  • Egroeg1000 Egroeg1000 on Aug 13, 2012

    Mine would be the very car that appears as my avatar: '86 Omni GLH Turbo. Once I realized this car existed, i knew I had to have it. I eventually found one at a used car lot for $3000 (a good price at the time.) Within a month, I had a blown head gasket. That was when I should have sent that car packing, but I loved that car. Replaced a total of 3 head gaskets, 3rd gear, half axle, and many other lesser troubles. Ended up letting the car sit at a relative's house when I moved out of state. The decision to junk the car was a painful one, but needed to happen. Yet, even with all those headaches, I would pick up another one (assuming I could get a complete history...)

  • MidLifeCelica MidLifeCelica on Aug 13, 2012

    1981 Camaro Z28, bought used for $5000 in 1983. Fully loaded (A/C, electric windows, T-roof, best of all - a standard transmission!). Spent lots of money on 'upgrades' - new cams, manifold, carb, exhaust system, suspension, 300W stereo, etc. So, kind of a voluntary money pit at first. For a year, the car was a dream, with an engine roar like the Tyranosaurus from Jurassic Park, capable of sending hardened bike couriers scurrying for the sidewalks. Ah, to be young and dumb! Then the issues started. Oil leaks. Gasoline leaks. Freon leaks. Water leaks through the T-roof. Windshield washer fluid leaks, for crying out loud. Brake fluid leaks - mostly from the Hurst Line Lock I installed that was not rated for -40 Calgary winters and blew out as I sailed through a red light one dark, cold (and fortunately empty of traffic) night. Every time I fixed one thing, another would pop up. The stiff Rancho suspension made the car handle superbly, but this was hard on tires and the car started shaking itself to pieces. After replacing a failed alternator, starter, and more headlight bulbs than anyone would believe, the final straw was when the timing chain ate through the timing chain cover, so that oil would shoot out the front if it was filled more than halfway up. Fully fixed, it was disposed of at the local Ford dealer as a trade-in for a showroom floor 1985 Ford Mustang GT. The two salesmen who took it for a test drive came back a little pale. Power AND handling - in a CAMARO? Able to make right-hand turns at 20 mph without body roll or tire noise? I got all of my initial purchase price and a little bit more in trade...which was still less than half of what I'd spent in total over two years. And yet, that's still my favorite car after all this time. I have to keep telling myself that the car was a pit in 1983, how could owning one now and 'restoring' it be any better?

  • Ashy Larry Ashy Larry on Aug 13, 2012

    In March of 2006 I purchased a clean, 15k mile, manual transmission CPO Volkswagen Golf TDI. In the next 3 months it required: -- AC recharge -- brake rotor replacement (way out of round) -- two (not one, two) transmissions -- replacement door seals because the driver and passenger side seals fell off -- replacement skid plate underneath -- trim piece replacement A true Monday morning car. Desperate to get rid of it (my daughter had just been norn and I was getting some nasty stinkeye from my wife for all the time I had to spend ferrying the car to the dealer, nevermind that I had lost trust that it would ever function well enough to carry my daughter anywhere), I sold it in June of 2006 at a $3k loss. I will likely never buy a VW again.

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