New York 2012: 2013 Mercedes-Benz GL Is The Latest Soccer Mom Chariot

Derek Kreindler
by Derek Kreindler

My girlfriend is really excited for tonight’s debut of “The Real Housewives of Vancouver”, and I bet that the Real Housewives already hankering for a new ride before the 36-month lease on their current GL350 BlueTecs are up. Here’s more questionably-built ostentatiousness to satiate their vapid souls.

I do have an affinity for the Mercedes-Benz GL because it can be had with the BlueTec diesel engine – a good number of them (apparently as high as 50 percent in Canada) are sold with the oil burner. I imagine that isn’t the case in the United States. The BlueTec 3.0L V6 diesel now makes 240 horsepower and 455 lb-ft.

Two gasoline V8s will also be offered, both 4.6L twin-turbo V8s. The GL450 makes 362 horsepower and 406 lb-ft of torque while the GL550 will make 429 horsepower and 516 lb-ft of torque, the better to get to hot yoga before that bitch in the Range Rover Sport steals your parking spot. A 7-speed automatic puts power to the ground. A radar-based collision avoidance system works at triple digit speeds, so you can yak on your phone without worrying about human life.

The GL350 starts at $62,445, and goes up to $86,175 for the GL550.





Derek Kreindler
Derek Kreindler

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  • Mandalorian Mandalorian on Apr 04, 2012

    It would be 10000% better with a standing hood ornament.

  • ClutchCarGo ClutchCarGo on Apr 04, 2012

    Are soccer moms really driving vehicles that start at $62K? It seems that if one can afford that price point, one hardly fits the soccer mom demographic.

    • See 3 previous
    • CA Guy CA Guy on Apr 05, 2012

      @Slab In my beach city and throughout the west side of LA, oh yes indeed. Right along with loads of Cayennes and Range Rovers.

  • MaintenanceCosts It's not a Benz or a Jag / it's a 5-0 with a rag /And I don't wanna brag / but I could never be stag
  • 3-On-The-Tree Son has a 2016 Mustang GT 5.0 and I have a 2009 C6 Corvette LS3 6spd. And on paper they are pretty close.
  • 3-On-The-Tree Same as the Land Cruiser, emissions. I have a 1985 FJ60 Land Cruiser and it’s a beast off-roading.
  • CanadaCraig I would like for this anniversary special to be a bare-bones Plain-Jane model offered in Dynasty Green and Vintage Burgundy.
  • ToolGuy Ford is good at drifting all right... 😉
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