By on September 28, 2011

In the annals of poorly-chosen songs, this one is right up there with the State of New Jersey’s almost-decision to make Springsteen’s “Born To Run” the state song. Yes, Maserati, you can do anything, you can be anyone… and you’re choosing to be the brand that pimps upgraded Grand Cherokees by invoking the ghost of Fangio over crappy power-pop. Do you really want to be reminding viewers that this is a conscious choice, picked from an infinite range of options? Because that kind of willful douchbaggery makes you, Maserati, look like you’re a half-step from becoming the official luxury brand of Jersey Shore.

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14 Comments on “Maserati: “We Can Do Anything”...”


  • avatar
    krhodes1

    Unbelievably cheesy video, but the car itself is the most attractive premium SUV going. Will probably have the nicest interior too. The current Jeep platform is top-notch for this sort of thing, so why not?

    And lets face it, choosing to buy something as flamboyant as a Maserati means you are probably pretty far up the douchebag scale to start with. Subtle they are not.

  • avatar
    Marko

    Maserati will do anything for Robert Ross, and Robert Ross will do anything for Maserati…

    Oh, goodness…

  • avatar
    SilverHawk

    Around the world, douche-bags line up in droves to purchase luxury SUVs. Hell, the market in the US is still hot as well. In the Middle East alone, every other vehicle on the road is from this category. In China, the douche-bags leave the chauffeurs at home, and drive their own lux utilities. That’s real dedication! The Fiat Group can use the profits to be had from a Maserati SUV. Let them share in the fun that the other luxury brands are enjoying.

  • avatar
    quiksilver180

    Maserati, look like you’re a half-step from becoming the official luxury brand of Jersey Shore.
    This, yes. There’s three douchebags that have Maseratis in my building alone in Portland. Other preferred brand is Land Rover.

    • 0 avatar
      pharmer

      I’ll second that for Minneapolis. There are a lot of them prowling around the trendy parts of town at bar time, piloted by exactly the type of guy you’d expect to be driving a Maser convertible past a club at 2:30 am…

  • avatar
    kid cassady

    Where is the historical heritage footage of the Biturbo in this ad?!

  • avatar
    essen

    I have a Quattroporte and the new Grand Cherokee, and I love them both. But I would never buy a Mas SUV (or any other European SUV, for that matter). In fact, if they are going to cheapen the brand like this, I might not but the Q when the lease is up, as I planned to do.
    As far as reliabilty goes, I’ve had it for a year and a half, and have had zero problems. The service is pricey, but the first required sevice is 24K or 2 years.

  • avatar
    mjz

    Seriously, what’s the big f+++ing deal? Porsche has done this already to great success. And they’re now about to do a “Cajun” successor. Why begrudge Maserati similiar aspirations? The market will decide. Besides, the Kubang is pretty damn hot.

  • avatar
    jimboy

    I am 100% behind you on this one, Edward. You nailed it, out of a number of choices Maserati could make, this is absolutely the worst one.

  • avatar
    rpn453

    The article title made me think of Anne’s Song by Faith No More, and for that I thank you. It’s been too long since I listened to Introduce Yourself. I was glad to see that they didn’t demean any interesting and creative songs by tying one to corporate branding. It’s impossible to ruin a song that’s as generic and meaningless as the one they used!

    we can do anything we want, we tell you again
    We can go anywhere tonight, cause we’re with Anne


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