New Research Reveals: Your Father's Oldsmobile Was Designed By A Sex-Obsessed Pervert

Bertel Schmitt
by Bertel Schmitt

Arthur Ross started in 1935 as a „Creative Designer” at GM. He did Cadillacs and Buicks. He had a hand in drawing the lines of some famous cars of those times, the Cadillac Sixty Special, LaSalle, Fleetwood, and the Buick Y-Job, GM’s first concept car. He also was a pervert.

Now don’t get me wrong. Where I come from, “pervert” is a honorific, and I have been to certain parties where the host proudly walked around with a red sash, inscribed “Hentai-ou.” Which is Japanese for something like “King of the perverts.” All in attendance bowed to him. It’s a Japanese thing. I’m familiar with harder core environments also. I worked for Volkswagen during a certain period. (“Bertel, how many girlfriends do you have?” “Two.” “Sorry, you don’t qualify for a board seat. Get some more.”) But let’s get back to Art Ross.

During the war, Ross was assigned to GM’s Camouflage and War Services Section. War over, he became Chief Designer of Cadillac, then Oldsmobile. Those were the golden years of American car design, and in fourteen years as Chief Designer, Ross literally changed the shape of the industry. In 1958, Ross left GM and started his own design house, Arthur Ross Associates. Remember the Parker Pen? A Ross design. Arthur Ross died in Chicago in 1981.

His estate contained a large body of art Ross had drawn, painted, airbrushed, and magic markered in his free time (and possibly during boring conferences.) It came in two genres.

His traditional art, including portraits, surrealistic paintings, and a treasure of car designs can be found at The Art Of Art Ross.com.

His, how shall I say this, more eclectic art is found at Erotica By Art Ross. Now let me warn you that this is not for the faint of heart. I had to do hours of painstaking research, sifting through his complete body of naked bodies, engaged in various activities, before I found one (and only one) image that is barely SFW. This is Thanksgiving weekend, you are not supposed to be working. You are safe unless your wife has installed snitching software on your home PC. In that case, she already knows about your activities. But once you click on Erotica By Art Ross, you see stuff your mother didn’t dare to warn you about. You have been warned now. I don’t want to hear any complaints.

Ross’s work reflects his fantasies of statuesque blondes, with the occasional BBW thrown in. His most prolific and most pornographic period was during the WW II time – designing new camouflage patterns obviously wasn’t challenging enough to keep his wandering mind focused.

So now we know it: Your father’s Oldsmobile was designed by a dirty young man.

(Side story: I wouldn’t have known, would I not have received mail from our in-house connoisseur of fine Detroitophilia, from our buff-book buff, Mr. Ronnie Schreiber. Strangely, he shied away from writing the piece himself, saying “I figured that it was suitable for B&B (Bertel & Baruth). I’ve only looked at just the home page, so I disclaim any blame if you find something offensive, or not offensive enough.” Sure, Ronnie. I just loved those erudite Playboy interviews.

Bertel Schmitt
Bertel Schmitt

Bertel Schmitt comes back to journalism after taking a 35 year break in advertising and marketing. He ran and owned advertising agencies in Duesseldorf, Germany, and New York City. Volkswagen A.G. was Bertel's most important corporate account. Schmitt's advertising and marketing career touched many corners of the industry with a special focus on automotive products and services. Since 2004, he lives in Japan and China with his wife <a href="http://www.tomokoandbertel.com"> Tomoko </a>. Bertel Schmitt is a founding board member of the <a href="http://www.offshoresuperseries.com"> Offshore Super Series </a>, an American offshore powerboat racing organization. He is co-owner of the racing team Typhoon.

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  • Porschespeed Porschespeed on Nov 30, 2010

    Beethoven was a fart sniffer, and Napoleon desired the (long) unwashed crotch of Josephine. Since the beginning of recorded history, the gifted have always been a little 'un-pc' vis-a-vis their sexual proclivities. While the Puritan streak of the US may frown upon those facts, the reality is that the historical record is what it is.

    • See 1 previous
    • Porschespeed Porschespeed on Dec 09, 2010

      A sin? Really? We all have our kinks, and LVB had his. Please tell me how this infringes on yours or mine.

  • Also Tom Also Tom on Dec 09, 2010

    @porschespeed: I can't speak for ajila but I'm thinking either he was joking or he intends that it kind of sullies the memory and work of a great composer to bring out that trivial and weird aspect of him. Just speculatin'.......

    • Ajla Ajla on Dec 09, 2010

      It was a (slightly paraphrased) line from A Clockwork Orange. So mostly a joke.

  • MaintenanceCosts It's not a Benz or a Jag / it's a 5-0 with a rag /And I don't wanna brag / but I could never be stag
  • 3-On-The-Tree Son has a 2016 Mustang GT 5.0 and I have a 2009 C6 Corvette LS3 6spd. And on paper they are pretty close.
  • 3-On-The-Tree Same as the Land Cruiser, emissions. I have a 1985 FJ60 Land Cruiser and it’s a beast off-roading.
  • CanadaCraig I would like for this anniversary special to be a bare-bones Plain-Jane model offered in Dynasty Green and Vintage Burgundy.
  • ToolGuy Ford is good at drifting all right... 😉
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