Toyota Invents Crash Test Dummy With Guts

by Bertel Schmitt

Published: May 27th, 2010

toyota invents crash test dummy with guts

Toyota announces a gut-wrenching innovation: Crash test dummies with intestines. I remember the unappetizing times when crash tests were performed with (dead) pigs, or, even more gross, with human corpses (not for public consumption.) The crash test dummy changed all this. No species developed faster than the anthropomorphic test device, a.k.a. the crash test dummy. Now, it made a big leap forward.

From crude beginnings in the 70s, more and more sophisticated dummies evolved. The dummy had a wife. The dummies had children. Following generations progressed rapidly. As crashes were more and more computer simulated, computer simulated crash test dummies begun to populate the virtual world.

All the while, the crash test dummy species was haunted by a big problem: Lack of internal organs. It’s damage to internal organs that kills you, and those organs could not be easily replicated. Until now.

In the labs of Toyota city a humanoid was created that would make Dr. Frankenstein faint with envy. The new guy is called THUMS 4, as in Total HUman Model for Safety, version 4.

The adult male of average build has detailed models of internal organs, which sets him apart from previous iterations that were all bones and brain. The brain was added in the previous release.

According to Toyota, THUMS 4 will yield 14 times more information than the previous generation of dummies, and represents a quantum leap in the studies of internal injuries. Damages to internal organs account for approximately half of all injuries sustained during automobile collisions.

Soon, THUMS 4 will receive a wife and a larger male cousin. With all internal organs properly in place, a child should not be far off, and with the help of Toyota technicians, even more sophisticated generations will be bred.

Toyota will not keep THUMS 4 to themselves. In fall of 2010, you can place an order with Toyota Technical Development Corporation, a TMC subsidiary, and they’ll sell you one.

#BertelSchmitt #CrashTestDummies #Japan #Safety #Toyota

Bertel Schmitt

Bertel Schmitt comes back to journalism after taking a 35 year break in advertising and marketing. He ran and owned advertising agencies in Duesseldorf, Germany, and New York City. Volkswagen A.G. was Bertel's most important corporate account. Schmitt's advertising and marketing career touched many corners of the industry with a special focus on automotive products and services. Since 2004, he lives in Japan and China with his wife <a href="http://www.tomokoandbertel.com"> Tomoko </a>. Bertel Schmitt is a founding board member of the <a href="http://www.offshoresuperseries.com"> Offshore Super Series </a>, an American offshore powerboat racing organization. He is co-owner of the racing team Typhoon.

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4 of 16 comments

Dr Strangelove on May 27, 2010

The next iteration will get gut feelings as well and be doing double duty in crash tests and market research.

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Ponchoman49 on May 27, 2010

Well with the number of fatalities pushing 86 in Toyota related crashes I can see the need for this or in other words you would have to be a dummy to drive a Toyota edition.

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- See 1 previous
- Bertel Schmitt on May 27, 2010
  
  May we direct your attention to http://www.thetruthaboutcars.com/confused-nhtsa-revises-toyota-body-count/#comment-1628592 ?
  
  Like
- JeremyR on May 27, 2010
  
  It doesn't matter where you direct the attention; the witch hunters are blind to facts.
  
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