Back in ’98, the BBC aired a fly-on-the-wall documentary series called “Back to the Floor.” A camera crew followed five British bosses who left the relative safety of the executive suite for a week's labor with downtrodden workers at the sharp end. When the show migrated to America’s PBS, it lacked the undercurrent of class warfare that gave Auntie Beeb’s original its zing. When Ford CEO Alan Mulally recently revived this scenario by playing car salesman, the results were equally dire.

Once I crossed the line, once I became a fifteen year-old driving addict, there was no turning back. Nothing could stop me from using my drug of choice. Like most addicts, I was willing to cross any line to get my fix. If my supply was cut off, I found another. Needless to say this is not my auto-biography’s most innocent chapter.

As Detroit slips into a quagmire of its own creation, The Big 2.5 are busy flexing rapidly wasting political muscles. On Tuesday, the top brass met with President Bush to forestall discuss plans for greater fuel efficiency. The next day, Senator Debbie Stabenow (D-MI) introduced The Japanese Currency Act. Like her Motown home boys, Stabenow claims the Japanese government is manipulating their exchange rate to provide an inherent– and inherently unfair– “discount” over American-made products. Uh, I don’t think so.

Riding in a golf cart to the nether regions of a dealership lot, an aging salesman explained his selling strategy. “Chryslers appeal to either male or female buyers,” he declared through nicotine-stained teeth. “Take the Compass. That’s for the ladies. The Wrangler? Boys’ toy.” As our EV reaches the 2008 Avenger, it's clear that the latest entry in The Dodge Boys' lineup is no purple Barbie Sport Convertible. But does The Avenger deliver the goods, or is “he” an impotent superhero look alike?

While the United Auto Workers (UAW) were busy plotting their future, The Detroit News ran a Cyber Survey. “Have UAW members given up enough or should auto makers expect more concessions?” As of the time I’m putting electrons to pixels, only 26 percent of the respondents agreed with the ungrammatical assertion “there’s been enough concessions.” The other 74 percent voted that the “UAW needs to make more concessions.” It’s not too promising when the home town crowd starts turning against you. But does it really matter?

Most of the guys I know have 93 octane racing through their veins. But I’ve also met more than a few women who have a need for speed, who lust after the fast and the furious, who live from one clichéd car movie moment to the next. So is a pistonhead born or made? Is it nurture or nitrous? While there’s no doubt that high testosterone levels help create (if not prolong the lifespan of) an automotive enthusiast, there’s more to motor mania than what you’re packing in your genes.

In 2002, GM reinvented Cadillac. The brand’s edgy new “Arts and Science” look reflected a clean break with the sagging fortunes of the former “Standard of the World.” Unlike Ford, which consigned its Lincoln brand to badge-engineered boredom, GM declared its determination to re-establish Cadillac’s lost luster. The world’s largest automaker’s premium brand unleashed a raft of new products, a last-ditch, all-out fight against the relentless erosion of its large luxury car business. A five year report card is overdue. First, a quick recap…

A commentator named Peakay recently posed a pointed question: “Do you guys like anything?” While there are plenty of positive reviews hereabouts, I understand Peakey’s frustration. When ttac.com publishes a rash of reviews describing nasty looking, badly built, dynamically dim-witted vehicles, the negativity eats away at this car lover’s soul. Which made the prospect of reviewing the Cadillac XLR-V a daunting proposition. I really wanted to like this car.

By the end of the year, America’s automotive landscape will have changed dramatically. Chrysler Group will have new owners with new ideas (including, perhaps, dissection). Ford may or may not be in Chapter 11. General Motors’ fate is equally unclear. One big gas price spike and it’s all over bar the filing. And then there’s the United Auto Workers (UAW). This is the year the UAW renegotiates its contracts with The Big 2.5. If the union digs in its proverbial heels to maintain the status quo, Detroit’s doom will be delayed, but not prevented. As will their own.

“A potent, new, 500-hp engine that uses less fuel.” While the newly refurbished Porsche Cayenne Turbo offers well-heeled buyers many delights, you wouldn't think fuel efficiency was the first amongst them. Yet Porsche’s print ads for the off-roader are touting their uber-SUV’s improved frugality, positioning the machine as a fun-to-drive grocery-getter for, gulp, environmentally conscious consumers. If Porsche were alone in this misplaced appeal to green values, it could be dismissed as aberrant lunacy. But they’re not so it can’t.